


Shaky Hands

by moosh



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Pre-Relationship, Rape, Whumptober 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-10 16:27:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20854778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moosh/pseuds/moosh
Summary: This is a fic I wrote for Whumptober 2019! I had planned on doing more, but then life happened.





	Shaky Hands

**Author's Note:**

> Prompts: No. 1 Shaky Hands and No. 21 Laced Drink. 
> 
> Trigger Warning: Rape, mention of drug use.

Pepper’s hands were shaking as she tried to talk to the detective, as she tried to remember what had happened. She kept looking up at Tony, who was pacing back and forth with his fists clenched and a look on his face like nothing she’d ever seen before. It was oddly quiet in the house though, despite the amount of activity that was going on. She could see the red and blue flashing lights out front as she watched the police officers descending the stairs carrying her dress and the bed sheets in evidence bags, and there were still dozens of party guests scattered around waiting to be interviewed before they were allowed to leave.

It was Halloween. Well, it had been Halloween. It was almost 5AM, so now it was November. But the night prior had been Halloween, and Tony threw a giant party out at his parent’s old mansion on Long Island in celebration.There had been hundreds of people there in very lavish costumes, and earlier in the night press had been out front taking pictures of the guests as they arrived. By the time Pepper had been conscious enough to crawl out of the bed and go find Happy, most of the guests had gone. _He’d_ probably gone.

“Ms. Potts, where did you get the drink?” The detective asked, looking up from her notebook.

“Oh um. From a tray. It was on a tray. There were loads of drinks being passed out on trays. We were trying to keep the bar lines small, so we had drinks being passed on trays. This was the last one on the tray. It was orange. It tasted like orange soda.” Pepper recalled, using every ounce of willpower that she had to keep the tears welling up in her eyes from spilling over again. She’d already cried so much in front of Happy, in front of Tony, in front of police officers, and she didn’t want to start again.

“Do you remember who was carrying the tray?”

“No. It was in the room with all of the blacklights. I don’t know.”

“Do you remember what you did with the glass?”

“I think I dropped it somewhere. I don’t remember. I don’t remember.” Pepper sighed, running her hands through her hair. She so desperately wanted to take a shower, but knew that it was still going to be several hours before she was allowed to do that. After she was done giving her statement she’d need to go to the hospital for an exam, where they’d need to take photos and take samples and give her a bunch of medications to help prevent any diseases.

“What do you remember after that drink? Was that the only drink you had at the party.”

“I uh - yes, that was the only drink. The press had just packed up and left and I wanted a drink.”

“Did anyone tell you to get a drink? Did anyone offer to get you one?”

Pepper just shook her head no, tightening the grip on her sweatpants. Well, _Tony’s_ sweatpants. Her dress had been ripped, so now she was wearing a pair of Tony’s sweatpants, an old SI t-shirt, and a zip-up hoodie.

“What happened after you finished the drink?”

Pepper closed her eyes and choked back a small sob, unable to help herself.

“All right.” Tony said, finally stopping his pacing. “Do we have to do this right now? Can’t she go lay down for a while? Hasn’t she been through enough?” He asked, the anger in his voice very evident.

“Mr. Stark, I need to get a statement from her before we go to the hospital. If you’re going to get in the way of that I’m going to have to ask you to step outs-”

“No!” Pepper interrupted. “Sorry, no. I want him to stay. Tony, I’m fine. I promise. Stop pacing, just sit down. Please?” She asked quietly, motioning to a spot next to her on the couch. She’d been working for him for almost 10 years now, and she could read him like a book. She knew he was upset, she knew he felt helpless, but more than anything she knew he felt guilty. But in that moment, all that she wanted was for him to be there next to her while she did this. She didn’t care he was still wearing overalls and a green shirt from his and Rhodey’s Mario & Luigi costumes, she didn’t care that she’d caught him smoking pot with a bartender earlier in the evening, nor did she care that he’d been making out with some woman dressed as a sexy R2D2 when Happy told him that he had to stop the party and call the police. She just cared that he was with her now.

Once he finally sat down Pepper took a deep breath and continued. “I don’t - I know I talked to Julia, from the press office, for a moment. Nothing important, just about how the arrival photos had turned out. And then I just - I think I started to feel a bit woozy. I think I was trying to get to a bathroom. And then - I don’t know, it starts to just come and go in chunks. I remember walking past the food, I remember an arm around me, I remember going up the stairs, but after that...just, nothing. Until...until I woke up? And he was, ya know, he was - my dress was ripped open and he was on top of me and I - I panicked I think, I was really confused and then I figured out what was going on and I told him to stop and tried to get away and um…” She trailed off, wiping away some of the tears that had started to fall again.

She reached out and grabbed Tony’s hand without even thinking about it, just needing that little bit on contact with someone that she trusted, someone that she felt safe with. She couldn’t recall ever holding his hand before, but without missing a beat he gave it a gentle squeeze, which was just enough reassurance to keep going.

“He...he put a hand over my mouth and another around my throat and he was really aggressive and I was afraid that - that he was going to kill me or something, I don’t know. So eventually I just gave in and let him finish and he did and that was it. I was still pretty out of it, even though I knew what was going on. I should’ve gone after him, I should’ve tried to tackle him or something, I don’t know. But I was afraid he’d do something. Afraid he’d hurt me. He was bigger than me, stronger than me, and I didn’t think that there was anyone else in that part of the house, so I just laid there for a while until it felt safe. I think I passed out again. I think a few hours passed. I don’t know. And then I went and found Happy and he found Tony and well, here we are.”

Pepper glanced down at hers and Tony’s hands, still tangled together. It just felt right, and it was exactly what she needed right now. She looked up to meet his gaze, trying to give him a small smile, though she was sure that with her red, puffy, glassy eyes it was rather pathetic. She’d collapsed in tears the moment she found Happy and told him what had happened, and she hadn’t really stopped since.

“Ms. Potts.” The detective started, finishing up jotting down notes. “You said earlier that he had a mask on. Can you tell me anything else about him? What he was wearing? Did he say anything?”

Pepper closed her eyes and shook her head no, which just made Tony give her hand another squeeze. “Um. It was dark, and he was either wearing all black or dark clothing. Black leather gloves. And yeah, one of those stupid all-black grim reaper masks, so I have no idea what he looked like. He was bigger than me, though. Definitely. He seemed muscular.”

“Anything else?”

“No.” Pepper replied solemnly. There was literally nothing to go on at the moment, which she felt badly about for some reason. Maybe she should have tried to rip his mask off or something, _anything_.

“All right. I know it’s been a long night, but we need to get you to the hospital to get checked out and to complete the rape kit.”

Pepper drew in a sharp breath at the word _rape_, but nodded her head and squeezed Tony’s hand again as she slowly stood up and walked to the foyer. She was so grateful that he was here and that he seemed to want to stay with her.

Rhodey and Happy were both sitting on a bench near the front door looking rather dejected, but both stood as they saw her, the detective and Tony approaching them.

“I’m going to take her to the hospital.” Tony declared as they reached the front door.

“I can drive you guys.” Happy offered groggily but genuinely.

“No, I’m gonna take her.” Tony replied sternly. “You guys - can you guys just make sure that everything is taken care of here? That everything is handled?”

“Of course Tones.” Rhodey said, stepping towards the pair of the. “Pep I - “ He started, searching for what to say. What do you say in this situation? Pepper wasn’t even sure what she wanted or needed to hear right now. “If you need anything, you know where to find me.”

Pepper looked up at the two of them and nodded. “Thanks guys. We have to go.”

The ride to the hospital was pretty quiet. Pepper was curled up in the passenger's seat next to Tony, leaning against the window and watching the first signs of sunrise stretching across the sky. At some point, Tony turned on some very low music in the background, but Pepper wasn’t paying attention to it at all. She just kept thinking about being held down, about his huge hand around her neck, and the terrifying feeling of drifting in and out of consciousness while it was going on. She didn’t even realize that they’d arrived at the hospital until Tony startled her a bit when he opened up her door and held out his hand.

“Come on, Pep. The sooner we get done with this the sooner you can take a shower and get some sleep, ok?” He said very sweetly, clearly trying his best.

“Tony?” She asked, taking his hand and stepping out. “Will you stay with me?” She knew this was a big ask. Being with her while she spoke to the detective was one thing, but being with her while she was poked and prodded from head to toe was another thing completely.

“Of course.” He replied almost instantly. “I wont leave your side.”

And he didn’t.

He was there while they examined her. He was there while they collected every sample, while they asked her if she could tell if he was wearing a condom, while they ran a black light over her stomach to see if he’d ejaculated anywhere else. He was there while they photographed the bruises on her things and on her neck and on her hands and while they drew blood and collected urine samples. And finally, he was there when they started giving her all of the medication. One to prevent pregnancy, one to prevent HIV, and a few others to protect her from other STIs. She’d need to go and get tested for everything in a few weeks, and he promised her that he’d be there for all of that too, if she wanted.

By the time they were finished the sun was fully up, and once back in the car Pepper fell asleep almost immediately as they drove out of the parking lot. She was so physically and emotionally exhausted, and even though she’d never been a person who was able to sleep in weird places easily before, she couldn’t help herself. She woke again some time later when the car finally stopped, and for a moment she was very confused. They were in a parking garage, not at the house on Long Island.

  
“We’re in Manhattan. I figured going back to the house...might not have been great.” He said, sensing her confusion. She just nodded, thankful for his thoughtfulness and thankful for the giant shower that she knew this place had. She tugged her hood up over her head and over her face as they walked through the garage to Tony’s private elevator. There was no one else around that she could see, but she still didn’t want to risk anyone seeing her like this. Once they arrived at Tony’s Penthouse he motioned towards the bathroom. “There’s towels and soap and whatever in there. I’ve got loads of clothes in my room if you want to put something else on. We can get your stuff later at some point. If you need anything just holler. Or ask J.”

Jarvis. Another great thing about the Penthouse was that it had Jarvis, unlike the Long Island Mansion. There was almost no security footage from the party, which was going to make everything a lot more difficult.

“Thanks Tony.” She said quietly, shrugging the hoodie off and heading towards the bathroom. Soon she was standing under the hottest stream of water that she could handle, scrubbing every single inch of her body. When she was done she just stood under the water for a while, letting her mind wander, and before she knew it she was crying again, full-on full body sobs, and she collapsed against the wall and slid down to the floor, where she pulled her knees up to her chin and just cried. She cried more than she had earlier, more than she’d ever recalled crying before in her life. She just kept running through everything that she remembered, everything that she’d done wrong. She should have just gone to her room and went to sleep, she shouldn’t have taken the drink, and she should have tried to fight back more and at least gotten the mask off of him. There was so much more she could have done.

She wasn’t sure how long she was in there, but eventually the tears stopped and she asked Jarvis to stop the water as well. Now she just needed to sleep. She pulled herself up and wrapped herself in a robe. She didn’t want to put the clothes back on that she’d been wearing earlier, since they still felt kind of dirty to her, so she made her way into Tony’s room. It was bright and sunny outside, but Tony’s room was dim and cool and she could see him sprawled out on top of the covers on his large bed. He’d managed to change out of the Luigi costume into actual pajama pants and t-shirt before falling into bed, and Pepper opted for a nearly identical outfit for herself.

Once changed, she stood at the edge of the bed watching him sleep. She knew that she was in love with him. She’d known for years, and it was always just an annoying little thing that she had to deal with. But the past few hours had made her love him even more, and now more than ever she knew that she completely trusted him. And felt safe and protected when she was with him, and the prospect of sleeping alone in one of the other huge bedrooms in the apartment when he was right here just seemed ridiculous. He hadn’t left her side since finding out what happened, so she didn’t think he’d mind a few more hours.

She climbed into the bed slowly, trying her best not to wake him up, but he did stir a bit when she laid down. He gave her a very weak, sympathetic smile as he rolled over to face her, though he still kept a fair bit of distance, which she appreciated. She didn’t want to be held or anything right now, she just wanted to be near him, and he seemed to understand that on some level.

“How was the shower?” He mumbled out against the pillow he was hugging close to his chest.

“Ok. Is this ok?” She asked quietly, dreading what would happen if he said no.

“Yeah. Of course.” He replied, closing his eyes. Though after a moment, he spoke again. “Pep? I’m - I’m really sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, Tony.”

“It’s not your fault either, Pepper.”

She was quiet again, trying to let his words sink in. On some level she knew that he was right and that it wasn’t her fault, but she couldn’t quite shake the feeling that it was. “Yeah.” She said with a sigh.

“Just sleep, ok? Just sleep.” He uttered almost too quiet to hear.

Pepper wrapped herself up in the blankets and closed her eyes, knowing that sleep wouldn’t fix everything, but it was certainly a start.


End file.
